Let me live that fantasy...

I turned in my final paperwork and it got real.  I know - how was it not real already?  I have no idea?  I guess I hoped it was all a really bad dream and I would wake up.  In a way I think I am waking up, but now I am finding my life prior to the divorce was the nightmeare.  I think I had to see what was really going on when I dropped that huge packet of paper in the the box.  What was shocking to me was the sadness that came with my submission.  I thought I would be happy or feel free...but it was basically the exact opposite.  

I had kind of started dating and all that business done.  I really am getting divorced and I need to take a significant amount of time to figure out what I really want from life.  You know, besides riding Napa, Mount. Baldy, Santa Barbara, Mount. Diablo and randomly setting out for crazy rides.  I should want more than that, right?